Rhythms of Grace Series

Rhythms of Grace - Silence & Solitude

“Solitude is the place of the great struggle and great encounter—the struggle is against the compulsions of the self, and the encounter is with the loving God who offers himself as the substance life.””
— Henri Nouwen

Can I be honest with you? The rhythm of silence and solitude has been the most difficult spiritual rhythm to develop in my life of faith. This is a bit surprising to me as I tend to be introverted in how I recover from the busyness of life AND I was theologically trained by the Quakers who are famous for having cultivated a significant rhythm of quiet attention to God’s presence. Go figure.

There’s no getting around the fact that silence and solitude as spiritual practices are not easy to incorporate. One of the difficulties of this spiritual rhythm comes when we realize just how “noisy” our inner reality is. Not only that but like Elijah in 1 Kings 19, the fear, stress, and anxiety we experience in life can leave us disillusioned, burnt out, angry, and lashing out at others or even God. This experience can leave us feeling spiritually deformed rather than transformed. Henri Nouwen writes:

“In solitude, I get rid of my scaffolding: no friends to talk with, no telephone calls to make, no meetings to attend, no music to entertain, no books to distract, just me — vulnerable, weak, sinful, deprived, and broken.”

At first, that doesn’t sound so pleasant, until you realize that, the heart of this practice is to invite Jesus into that place of vulnerability. And as a reminder, God is a good father, loving, full of mercy and grace. There is nothing like having him speak life into the depths of your being.

In the scripture, Jesus began his ministry with forty days of withdrawal into the desert. He fasted and prayed in silence and solitude. He was alone, hungry, hot, thirsty, surrounded by animals, and tested by Satan. We read this and we might feel sorry for Jesus as we empathize with his situation.

The truth is that Jesus was sustained throughout his forty days by the Father, the Scriptures, prayer, and the ministering angels that came to strengthen him. Throughout Jesus’ ministry we see him withdraw from the crowds again and again – often getting up early in the morning to be quiet and alone. Henri Nouwen continues:

“Solitude is the place of great struggle and great encounter—the struggle is against the compulsions of the self, and the encounter is with the loving God who offers himself as the substance life.”

That is something I desperately want - Jesus to be the focus, purpose, and substance of my life. These things can be developed in silence and solitude.

How do I develop a rhythm of silence and solitude: 

  1. Schedule it - put it on your calendar. Heathy spiritual rhythms are as important as anything else that would normally go on your to-do list.

  2. Start Slow - Silence & Solitude are practices that get easier over time. Don’t dive into the deep end and start with a long period of silence or solitude. Start with 5 minutes and go from there.

  3. Anchor your thoughts in Scripture - as you begin this practice you’ll notice how distracted your thoughts are, that’s okay. To aid you as you focus on the Lord’s presence, memorize a verse or a phrase in scripture that you can repeat to yourself as you work through the distractions.

  4. Bring a Journal - Journaling is helpful in two ways: first, you can write down all your distractions letting them move from your mind and heart onto the page. That can free you to focus on God’s presence. Second, you can write down anything you might get from the Lord as you linger in prayer.

  5. Don’t give up - five minutes, at first, will feel like two-hours, but don’t give up it will get easier. Your motivation will change as you begin to form a deeper intimacy with God - soon you will look forward to your opportunities for silence and solitude.

Rhythms of Grace - Sabbath

“Something about the beauty and the kindness and the concreteness of [Sabbath] pierced my self-sufficiency and melted the hardness of my activism; all I wanted to do was fall down and worship a God who would think to give us such a gift.”
— Ruth Haley Barton

When my daughters were very young, I sat in church one Sunday and listened to a beautiful sermon about Sabbath rest. The pastor encouraged us to challenge our culture of busyness and to rein in our packed calendars so that we might embrace the practice of Sabbath rest as we were created to do.

I was inspired. My spirit and body ached for the deep rest that the pastor described. As a young mom, I was tired all the time. As the service continued, I started to mentally go over my family’s calendar, determined to make the cuts necessary to create room for Sabbath rest. I envisioned a full night’s sleep, a hot breakfast, happy and well-rested children, good coffee and good conversation.

By the time I returned home, though, my hopes had deflated. The events on my calendar were not expendable – they were doctor’s appointments and oil changes, church small group gatherings and preschool field trips. And even if I had canceled any of these things, the “free” time would be anything but restful. I was a mom to a preschooler and a toddler – my days were full and exhausting, but at the end of each day, it would have been hard to describe what had filled the hours. Diapers, nap schedules, futile cleaning, meal preparation, more diapers, laundry, answering the endless questions of a preschooler, and a million other constant and immediate tasks. A day with nothing on the calendar would not eliminate this kind of busyness.

I felt defeated. Here I was instructed as a follower of Jesus to observe the Sabbath, and I recognized Sabbath rest as a gift from God, and yet there seemed to be no way to actually practice it. I felt like a failure.

Later that same day, as I read scripture for a few minutes before going to bed, I came across these words in Isaiah 40:11 -

He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.

He gently leads those that have young.

In that moment, the Holy Spirit gently reminded me that God knew the details of my life. He knew that my baby did not sleep through the night. He knew that my lunch on most days was the crust from my daughter’s sandwich and the same cup of coffee that I had reheated three times. He knew that the responsibilities of parenting would continue even on a day set aside for rest. And he promised to gently lead me. Gently. Not with judgment or rigid requirements. Not with demands that I simply couldn’t meet. Gently.

In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus invites us into true rest, a rest that only he can offer. Notice his gracious words of invitation:

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly. (The Message)

Did you find yourself taking a deep breath as you read Jesus’ words? Are you tired? Check. Worn out? Check. Burned out on religion? Check. Jesus invites us to get away with him and to live again. By walking and working with him, by watching how he lives, we can learn how to take a real rest. His ways are not heavy, nor are they ill-fitting.

I am encouraged to know that Jesus’ time of rest was frequently interrupted, even as mine was as a young mother. He regularly retreated from his work to rest and pray, to spend time with his Father; but sometimes, the crowds followed him to ask for teaching or healing or simply to be in his presence. As a human living in an imperfect world, Jesus faced demands on his time, responsibilities, interruptions, and immediate needs, just as you and I do. And yet still he tells us, “I’ll show you how to take a real rest…watch how I do it.”

Let me encourage you to get away with Jesus. Spend time in his presence. Watch his ways and find rest in him. This is Sabbath. While your season of life may not allow for the Sabbath of your dreams, Jesus invites you into a time of rest that he himself orchestrates, a rest deeper than anything we could ask or imagine. He knows the realities of your life, and in his gentle and welcoming way, he promises to show you how to take a real rest in a perfectly-fitting way.

Rhythms of Grace: Scripture

“What I mean to insist upon is that spiritual writing - Spirit-sourced writing - requires spiritual reading, a reading that honors words as holy, words as a basic means of forming an intricate web of relationships between God and the human, between all things visible and invisible.”
— Eugene H. Peterson, Eat This Book

I recently bought a helpful resource called Unfolding Grace. It’s a book that highlights 40 major passages of scripture in the bible. It’s written in a more narrative form and its goal is to tell the overarching story of scripture in an engaging way that’s easy for people who may be at the beginning of their journey with God. This resource also comes with a workbook which provides an opportunity to answer some questions about what one might be reading. I like these resources. I also really like the title they choose, “Unfolding Grace,” what a great way to think about the story told in scripture. 

Much could be said about the beauty, majesty, power, and wonder of scripture. We read in 2 Timothy 3:16-17 that,

“All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.”

It’s not hyperbole to say that in the pages of Scripture you will find life. God reveals himself and the story of his unfolding grace in the pages of this sacred text and it can speak directly into your situation. I write this as a gentle encouragement to develop a rhythm of time with the book that is the primary text for all Christian spirituality - and the primary venue of God’s revelation to the world.

Eugene Peterson writes in his book, Eat This Book, “Reading [scripture] is an immense gift, but only if the words are assimilated, taken into the soul - eaten, chewed, gnawed, received in unhurried delight.” When is the last time you sat down with the Bible in unhurried delight?

Almost four years ago I drastically changed my schedule. I had recently returned from an overseas trip and found myself waking up each morning around 4:00am. Those first few mornings were an incredible gift. I was wide awake and so decided to take advantage of the quiet (which was a dream come true with young children) and spend time reading the bible. My heart was so refreshed and enlivened by the words of scripture on those mornings that I decided to make that early morning routine permanent. These days I wake up around 4:45am, go for a run, then spend time in scripture - it’s still a joy!

Honestly, there are some mornings where I find myself giving in to the temptation to spend too much time reading the news, or looking at social media - which these days feels like is instant “doom spiraling” - but I always come back to scripture even if it’s for a few minutes and find a loving God who confronts me with the truth and invites me into an ever-deepening relationship.

In fact, I think during these very difficult days with all that is happening in our country it’s exceedingly important for each of us to reflect on the volume of time we spend letting various news sources shape our heart and mind. We also need to be reflective on those particular sources we rely on for our information. How does the volume of time and the sources you choose compare to the amount of time you let the scripture and the truth of Jesus shape your thinking and actions?

The way of our culture is not the same way of the Kingdom of God. It’s clear to me in these days there has been some tangling of concepts about what it means to follow Jesus and our hope for a particular cultural and/or political outcome. The best avenue we have to begin some needed disentangling is to spend copious amounts of time with and in the scripture. May I ask you again, when is the last time you sat down with the Bible in unhurried delight?

I want to encourage you to carve out some time for this vital rhythm. Even if you’ve been following Jesus for a long time, don’t be so familiar with the story that you lose a sense of awe and wonder at the truth told in the pages of the Bible. Below you’ll find some resources that might help you rekindle a love for Scripture and carve out some time for this vital rhythm. Don’t be afraid to get caught up in the story of God’s unfolding grace that is focused on our redemption and the redemption of the world. Blessings on your week!